1. Surprise him with tickets to his first Blackhawks game. Splurge on 100-level seats. Remember, you want to be his hero, not his half-hero. Take a picture of his excitement.
2. Pick him up from school early and head downtown to beat the rush hour traffic. Bring his iPad to distract him from requesting bathroom stops. CHARGE THE iPAD.
3. Eat the pre-game meal at Ed Debevic’s and allow him to hurl insults right back at the staff.
4. Arrive at the United Center as they open the doors. Walk him down to your seats and watch him soak in the essence of being one of the first people inside a 20,500-seat arena.
5. Under no circumstances do you miss the National Anthem. There’s nothing else like it in sports.
6. Buy him ice cream, and give in when he asks for another treat and another after that.
7. Let him taunt Jonathan Quick, the L.A. Kings’ goalie, who’s close enough to hear your son shout, “You’re not quick! You’re a slow butthead!”
8. Frame a picture of him with Tommy Hawk.
9. Ensure that the Blackhawks win. If they lose, it’s your fault.
10. You’ve set the bar incredibly high, so it’s a good idea to explain to your son that you can’t always guarantee these seats or a victory.
Congratulations on being his hero.
David Telisman writes the blog Chocolate Diapers. He lives in Northbrook with his wife and two sons.