8 Products we were hoping for in the future of parenting

It’s 2010, and frankly, we’re disappointed. Where are the flying cars? The teleport pads?

Simply add cartridges of diapers, wipes and powder. Place your baby on the changing area, hit the button and robotic arms gently and quickly handle the entire changing process. A vacuum quickly sucks up the undesirable odors and ventilates them outside your house.

Automatic diaper station

Whether in line at the supermarket with the candy rack or trying to leave the toy store, a tantrum is in the works. One quick spray from the can and your child will be instantly induced to get off the floor, wipe the tears from their eyes and remind you that he or she loves you.

Anit-Tantrum spray

A quick blast from the sleep ray and within 10 minute your child will not only be tired, but will brush their teeth, go to the bathroom and then instinctively seek out their bed. No need to worry about an accidental zapping, as the 10 minute window allows ample time for the child to reach a cozy sleeping area. Moms should note that because of the strong similarities between a man’s brain and a child’s, that the sleep ray is surprisingly effective on dads. Dads, no such luck on moms, their brains are far more advanced.

Sleep ray

A small clip-on device, no bigger than a pedometer. The device monitors the air quality within a 5 yard radius and picks up on the slight increase in the air’s acidity just before your child is about to hurl. Expect 5-10 minutes of advance notice so be prepared to grab a bucket quickly or grab your child and run for the nearest bathroom an exterior space when you hear the alarm go off.

Puke detector

Backseat Magnetic Forecefield

Moms have relied on their sixth sense for millenia, catching their kids in all sorts of trouble. But wouldn’t it be easier to figure out who broke the vase, who started it or who gave the dog chocolate if you actually had eyes in the back of your head?

Actual eyes in the back of our heads

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