Remember when we were kids and spent a lot of time on the phone talking with our friends? Those days are long gone and instead tweens and teens are texting — a lot. The language kids use in those digital conversations, however, is one that parents often don’t speak. If you’re wondering what your kids are texting about, here’s some help decoding tween and teen texts.
You may know that “Netflix and chill” doesn’t mean “let’s get together to catch up on ‘Stranger Things’ or ‘The Crown,’” but rather is an invitation to hook up. But the terminology kids use goes far beyond that.
Here are some terms that parents may not know:
9 or CD9 or Code 9: Parents are around
99: Parents are gone
53X: Sex
143: I love you
420: Marijuana reference
1174: Meet at a party spot
AF: As f**k
ASL: Age/Sex/Location
Basic: Someone who is viewed as boring or a conforming person
CU46: See you for sex
Dabbing: Refers to concentrated doses of cannabis, also a dance craze
DYWTMUS: Do you want to meet up somewhere?
FINSTA: Fake Instagram account
FWB: Friends with benefits
GTG: Got to go
GNOC: Get naked on camera
GYPO: Get your pants off
ILY: I love you
IRL: In real life
ISO: In search of
IWSN: I want sex now
J/K: Just kidding
Juul: Type of e-cigarette that is small and discreet, pods are used for smoking
KMN: Kill me now
KMS: Kill myself
KYS: Kill yourself
LH6: Let’s have sex
Lit/Turnt/Turnt Up: Something that’s active or popular, can also refer to being stoned or drunk
LOL: Laughing out loud
MPFB: My personal f**k buddy
NGL: Not gonna lie
NP: No problem
NIFOC: Nude in front of computer
OMFG: Oh my f**king God
PAL: Parents are listening
POS: Parent over shoulder
PIR: Parent in room
ROTFLMAO: Rolling on the floor laughing my a$$ off
UH: Are you horny?
SH: Sh** happens
SMD: Suck my d**k
SMDH: Shake my damn head
SMH: Shaking my head, meaning “I don’t believe it” or “that’s so dumb”
Snatched: On point, very good or well styled
TBH: To be honest
TDTM: Talk dirty to me
TF: The f**k
Thot: Stands for “that hoe over there” and is often used instead of “slut”
TWD: Texting while driving
WTF: What the f**k?
WTTP: Want to trade pics?
WUF: Where you from?
WYD: What you doing?
“The language is always going to change, but it’s good to be at least somewhat in the know and not oblivious to the fact that tweens and teens do use coding to talk with each other,” says Kortney Peagram, PhD, of Bulldog Solution in Chicago, which hosts student programs and parent workshops focused on eliminating bullying and promoting safety online.
However, Peagram cautions that parents “not obsess over it, and don’t become more interested in the decoding than what’s going on with your kid.” Instead, she recommends monitoring kids when they’re in middle school (or earlier if they have a phone) to make sure they’re being safe. Parents can do less monitoring as kids get older, but make sure that they are aware of the consequences of sexting.
She says that it’s best for parents to keep the lines of communication open and building a strong parent-child relationship. And don’t be afraid to ask when you don’t understand what a text means. “When kids trust you, they’re more likely to explain things to you,” she says.
Most importantly, she stressed that parents need to repeatedly encouraging kids to think about the consequences of what they say and share via text. “They need to hear that they should always think before they send something,” she advises.
