According to a recent survey, 75 percent of married women say a
good sex life is "important or very important" to them. Good to
know. So why aren't we having more of it?
An informal poll of my fellow mom friends revealed that
most are like me-struggling to carve out time to "get busy" with
our husbands. And even if we manage to find the time, it's not that
easy to get in the mood.
"After a long day of running around, taking care of the
kids, and finally getting them into bed, the last thing I want to
do is have to think about my husband's needs, too," admits one of
my girlfriends, who insists on remaining anonymous. "Now that we
have two kids, we have sex maybe once a month."
"But it's not high on my priority list right
My friend should rethink those priorities, says Debra
Herbenick, Ph.D., a research scientist at Indiana
"Sex is important as it helps people feel connected," says
Herbenick, author of Sex Made Easy: Your Awkward
Questions Answered-For Better, Smarter, Amazing Sex
(Running Press, 2012). "It's a way to have fun with your
partner, to see a side of them that no one else gets to
If you're not happy with the quantity or quality-or
both-of your sex life, don't despair. Even the busiest parent can
take steps to improve their love life, which will improve their
relationship as well. It's win/win.