It's here again, people, that Sunday in May we set aside to honor all things mom. But how do you say "you rock!" and "we love you!" in a way she'll really dig? Here are a few ways not to:
1. Sunday brunch. Unless your mom is over 70 or you've found an amazingly hip place in the city that's gotten outstanding reviews and is serving free mimosas, save your jack. We'd prefer to be brought hot coffee, the Sunday paper and a bed-tray breakfast served by jammie-clad waiters who will ultimately pile in bed and eat it all anyway.
2. Gifts with strings. This includes any sort of fitness equipment, kitchen appliance, gift card for home improvement stores, cooking paraphernalia and what-you-find-sexy lingerie. You want to know what she really wants? Ask her girlfriends.
3. Flowers arranged by someone else. We'd rather receive a bouquet of secretly plucked blooms from the mean neighbor's garden, than a perfectly symmetrical bunch you ordered online. Take the kids to the grocery store, let them pick their favorites and have them arrange the posies themselves. Our mushy maternal heartstrings will be sufficiently pulled.
4. A whole day of family fun! We adore our kids and the time we spend with them every day, 24/7. But Mama needs a little "me time," too. Instead of a non-stop array of kid-friendly Mother's Day activities, plan a family-bonding activity for the morning and a mani-pedi-massage trio for the afternoon. Trust me, boys, we need them both.
5. Anything sent via e-mail, Facebook, Twitter or text. This one should be a no-brainer but someone out there in cyber space is going to try and get away with a virtual shout-out this Mother's Day. No matter how cute you think that e-card is, please, unplug yourself and call your mother.