The Skokie mom’s biggest frustration: She couldn’t figure out why infant Mia was crying. She remembers a friend asking her why her baby was crying and having to respond, "I don’t know."
Crying is a baby’s first form of communication. It is the response to an unpleasant or painful stimulus, and is designed to be alarming to others so someone will come to the baby’s aid. But trying to figure out why a baby is crying can be a huge source of frustration to first-time parents.
"When you’re an adult, there are a number of ways you can communicate to show people your internal states. Babies can’t. They use cry to indicate their internal state," says Dr. Larry Gray, associate professor of pediatrics at the University of Chicago.
We want babies to cry from their first moments, yet one of our jobs as new parents is to get them to stop crying by finding the cause of their discomfort. Cry and response between newborn and parent marks the beginning of the parent-child relationship and the start of bonding.
Why babies cry
In his book, Why is My Baby Crying? (HarperCollins, 2005), Barry Lester, a cry expert and founder of the Colic Clinic at Women & Infants Hospital in Providence, R.I., describes two types of cries in newborns: the basic cry and the pain cry.
A basic cry is clear, not terribly loud and doesn’t last too long. Babies have an easier time of winding down or even stopping their own crying when it is a basic cry.
The pain cry, however, is the impressive, show-stopping cry of an infant getting a vaccination. It is loud, usually high-pitched, of sudden onset and includes long periods of breath-holding.
Academic research on crying dates back to the 1960s when most studies examined cries of infants diagnosed with medical conditions. Researchers assessed the cries of sick babies to determine if and how they differed from healthy babies’ cries, in pitch, decibel level, duration, phonation and utterances.
One of the most notable uses of cry research is the search for an early marker for sudden infant death syndrome, for which there are no other clinical signs. In a study of more than 21,000 infants at high risk for SIDS, researchers identified a cry characteristic that increased the risk for SIDS 32 times. The infants who died of SIDS showed these cry characteristics.
Unfortunately, researchers still are far from any useful clinical application of these findings. Many babies who did not die of SIDS also had the cry characteristic.
Another reason to study crying, according to Linda LaGasse, assistant professor of pediatrics at Brown Medical School, is to help parents understand what their crying baby is trying to tell them.
It took several months for Garcia to figure out the cries of her daughter, but she finally was able to reduce the causes to the usual laundry list: wet diaper, hungry, cold, tired.
Knowing why Mia was crying made it easier for Garcia to soothe her. By the time Mia was 7 or 8 months old, Garcia noticed her cries had become more of a whine. "They’re more in their world and are crying because they want something or they see something they can’t reach."
Goodness of fit
Now with her second child, son Jesús, she and her husband are more relaxed parents. "We’ve learned that there’s very little chance that there’s something very serious, so with Jesús, we’re a lot calmer," Garcia says.
Researchers would say that Garcia’s temperament is perfectly matched to her child’s temperament. This "goodness of fit" refers to how well the caregiver can interpret or perceive a baby’s cries.
A good (accurate) response to a baby’s cries enhances infant development, says LaGasse. A bad response, to an extreme, can endanger the infant. Shaken baby syndrome is a tragic response to a baby’s uncontrollable crying.
One study found the better a parent responds to a child’s cries, the better the child’s cognitive and language development at 18 months.
But no matter how much academics learn about why babies cry, the research always will have limitations for an individual family.
Says Gray: "I can’t, as a researcher, analyze an individual baby’s cry and say, 'A baby’s going to do X or Y over time.' It’s more like a language. The baby and the mother have to be part of a process of mutual discovery, using the baby’s behavior of crying as language. It is in hearing the cry that the mom knows: Her baby’s telling her, ‘I’m actually OK.’ "
Judith A. Weinstein, who lives in Chicago, is a public health educator, writer and the mother of three.