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Words of Wisdom

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Monday, March 15, 2010
Cathy Cassani Adams
The Self-Aware Parent

 

Recent posts

Practice makes perfect when dealing with kids' emotions - 5/6/2013

The best ways to praise your child for a job well done - 4/15/2013

Be yourself with or without the kids around - 2/26/2013


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Books that I love are underlined and rabbit eared and I write down quotes so I can keep them close and share them with others.  If I am attached to a song it's always because of the lyrics, and listening to a speaker, who uses language to help me think clearly, more positively, is one of my favorite experiences.

I am a "word person" so quotes help me examine a new perspective and see the world a little differently.  Below are some of my favorites.  Some have become integrated into my belief system and some serve as a reminder that I still have some work to do.

Spiritual practice is like physical exercise:  it has a cumulative effect, and if we want to enjoy our benefits, we can never stop doing it.

~ Marianne Williamson

At some point in my life I believed that if I read enough books and dealt with enough challenges I would eventually understand myself and reach some kind of spiritual awareness.  The truth is that personal discovery lasts a lifetime and new lessons are part of the journey.  Spiritual practice is a muscle that needs to be worked consistently, not a task that can be accomplished.

Most people treat the present moment as if it were an obstacle that they need to overcome. Since the present moment is Life itself, it is an insane way to live.

~ Eckhart Tolle

We spend so much of our lives rushing to the next thing, hurrying to the next place, focusing on what's next rather than what is in front of us.  Living in the moment can be a challenge, but when the effort is made, you feel joy and freedom.

Don't just do something, sit there.

~ Jon Kabat-Zinn

Our society believes that constant productivity is the key to life.  We check tasks off our list to generate the feeling of accomplishment, but we are completely disconnected from what we really want and who we really are.  Jon Kabat-Zinn is the great teacher of mindfulness, and he reminds us to take time for quiet and awareness.

We worry about what a child will become tomorrow, yet we forget that he is someone today.

~ Stacia Tauscher

Parents tend to focus their energy on the future.  The concerns are about future grades, potential failures, inability to go to the best college or other "what if" scenarios. Future concerns disconnect you from the people that are standing in front of you, the people that need attention for who they are right now.

You must unlearn what you have learned.

~ Yoda, from The Empire Strikes Back

There are so many great Yoda quotes, he is such a wise Jedi, but this one resonates with me the most.  Sometimes you are taught things that are not true.  Sometimes you have beliefs about yourself and others that are not true.  It is difficult work to let go of a belief system that is limiting or negative, but opening your mind to new ideas and a different perspective is a step toward peace.

Your children are not your children. They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.  They come through you but not from you. And though they are with you, yet they belong not to you. You may give them your love, but not your thoughts. For they have their own thoughts. You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you. For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.

~ from The Prophet by Kahlil Gibran

This is the classic reminder that children are not "ours", nor should they be expected to think or act exactly like we do.  As parents our job is to support, love and keep our children safe, but also to allow their true self to emerge so they can live an authentic and happy life.

Believe nothing, no matter where you read it, or who said it, no matter if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense.
~ Buddha

This is important in our personal lives, but even more important in our parenting.  There are many experts out there, all of them offering the perfect way to parent.  This can cause you to give away your power and look outside of yourself for answers instead of listening to your own gut.  Experts can offer new ideas or a new perspective, but it's only effective if it resonates with your inner wisdom.

I don't know why
The sky is so blue
And I don't know why
I'm so in love with you
But if there were no music
Then I would not get through
I don't know why
I know these things, but I do

~ from the song I Don't Know Why by Shawn Colvin

Marrying my husband was my first adult decision that came straight from my heart.  I didn't need outside opinion or validation to know that this is the person that I wanted to be with (luckily everyone agreed…).  This song was played during our wedding video and the words have become my mantra.  Whenever I am feeling completely sure of something and I have that deep feeling of trust, I hear Shawn's voice, "I don't know why I know these things, but I do….."

Nothing important, or meaningful, or beautiful, or interesting, or great, ever came out of imitations.  What is really hard and really amazing, is giving up on being perfect and beginning the work of becoming yourself. Look, everyday, at the choices you are making and when you ask yourself why you are making them, find this answer:  Because they are what I want, or wish for.  Because they reflect who and what I am.

~  from Being Perfect by Anna Quindlen

My map for a happy life.


Do you have a favorite inspirational quote?  Feel free to comment.

Cathy Adams is a certified parenting coach, yoga instructor and mother to three girls.

See more of Cathy's stories here.

Contact Cathy at cathycadams@sbcglobal.com

 
a quote

By Linda K. PetersenSmith on Tuesday, November 13, 2012

It matters not where you came from, what matters is what you do with yourself while you are here. This came to me while receiving bodywork. Do I claim it as mine or the divine? You decide. Namaste, Linda.

my fav quotes

By Carrie Kelleher on Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Here are two of my favorite quotes: "There is a strength in loving. If you love someone you must be strong enough to allow them to be." "Oh wonderful, wonderful, and most wonderful wonderful, and yet again wonderful..." As You Like It, Shakespeare I loved the quote from Stacia Tauscher - that's one of my favorites as well!

quotes and speakers

By shayne adams on Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Marianne Williamson has been speaking every Wednesday night in Los Angeles, free admission, since January. Your topic has inspired me to go hear her one of these Wednesdays because I literally drive by the auditorium on my way home from work, where her name is in big letters. (and i think of you because you gave me a book by her once, when i was struggling) I really liked the Yoda quote, because that is one of the biggest challenges for me, to unprogram myself from old ideas. I have found more growth in myself when i let go of an old idea or belief. I say this in my morning meditation: (i don't know who wrote it, but it's called "The Set Aside Prayer") "Please help me to set aside everything I think I know and allow me to have an open mind and a new experience." simple, yet effective. I find that either reading a daily meditation book just before meditating or repeating a good quote slowly in my head while visualizing each word, will help keep me focused and calm in that moment and even throughout the day. One of my favorite writers is Melody Beattie. Here are a couple of her quotes: “Live your life from your heart. Share from your heart. And your story will touch and heal people's souls.” and “Each moment in time we have it all, even when we think we don't.”

Quoting my mother...

By Connie Anderson on Tuesday, November 13, 2012

"You can choose to laugh or cry, but crying makes your mascara run, so you might as well laugh". -Margaret Englund

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