Chicago mom wants to be a yes mom

 
 

By Melissa Haak

Peanut Butter in my Hair
 

As moms we say no a lot.

“No you can’t have a lollipop for breakfast.”

“No you can’t wear a pink tank top with a red, white and blue mini skirt to school.”

“No you cannot hit your sister on the head with a teapot.”

{All things I said today}.

We sometimes fall into the routine of saying no, not now, in a minute … without really thinking about it, without hearing the request. With two toddlers in the house now I have become acutely aware of how often we resort to those defaults when my 3-year-old holds up a finger and says “In a minute mommy!!” when I ask her to do something.

I have spent the last few weeks trying to be more of a “yes” mom.

I mean I’m not going to let her have a lollipop for breakfast or allow the 18 month old to terrorize the house with his left hook. No I’m talking about saying yes to the things that seem like they are small but are so much bigger.

Coloring a picture on the floor.

Letting her skip a nap to watch “My Little Pony” curled up next to me.

Letting them paint for no reason.

It’s easier to do with the toddlers. Their requests are usually quite simple and bring them so much joy. What about the bigger ones? This weekend we were at my husband’s company picnic. They had bungee trampolines. You can get incredible height and do easy flips. My big kids wanted to do it, badly! They wanted me to do it, too. It looked fun and I wanted to, but my gut said…

“You’re almost 40.”

“You will embarrass yourself or your husband.”

“Um, you aren’t exactly shaped like a gymnast anymore.”

I shook it off and said YES.

It was exhilarating and fun! While flying into the sky and doing back flips like I was 18 again none of that mattered. I didn’t care that I’m rounder than I used to be or my thighs are bigger. They propelled me high, my arms strong enough to pull me over. It was a blast and the kids couldn’t believe I did it! They loved it! I was the only parent in line, the only one they saw do it.

So I’m going to keep working on this saying yes thing, to my kids and to myself. What can you say yes to today?

 
 







 
 
 
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